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Office Spider
sh ShlinkedIn Platinum
Self-made CEO at Dark Corner Next to Your Desk
2 years ago • 🗣️ Thought Leader

Time for some real talk. I know this platform is for inspiration and Thought Leadership, but hear me out. I had an experience with an employee the other day and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. Usually my mind is churning out ideas on core business strategy, things like financial models and our next buzzword. But this was different. I sat in a dark corner. He sat at the desk, slumped and not making eye contact. "I am ashamed," the employee told me in confidence, "I am ashamed I didn't make more money or hit a single financial target last year. Everyone else is crushing it, hitting goals and bragging about the grind on ShlinkedIn." Defeat. It was carved into his dry fleshy exterior, etching lines into his pale flaky skin. This is a professional networking site. It isn't a competition. We could use the platform to uplift others, to grow the value of the self. We could change the perception of success. I dropped down from the dark corner, landing on the employee's left hand. "WHAT THE--" He shouted and flinched so hard back that he fell off his chair. "Oh god that's a big one! Shit! I don't need this right now!" I maintained my grip as he violently shook his hand, trying to fling me away. And I knew what I had to do. He tasted bitter, ashy, and dry against my mandibles. I injected him with my award winning formula of venom, skittered down his sleeve and into his shirt, and wove tight strands of thorax silk around his body. When my work was done, he did not move and his purple-blue lips spoke no more of failures. Sometimes you have to pull yourself away from social media. When it no longer uplifts you, when it only reflects your shortcomings back at you, then you need to step away. Some people aren't capable of that. So I decided to intervene. He was going to bring us all down with his negativity and inability to positively contribute to this beautiful platform, so removing the bug from the system will benefit us all in the end. This is how I choose to use the platform and I hope it has uplifted you all. We really didn't need his negativity. #ThursdayThoughts #CommunityService #UpliftingStories

2 Comments

Love it! Just wondering: Is this posting also available as an audio book?

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MURDERER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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