Jack “Two Chains” Burkerking
Founder and Supreme Overlord of BurgerGlobeTM, a fast food empire conquering nations through belly satisfaction and relentless expansion.


Past Accomplishments:

Disrupted disruption by starting 17 unicorns before breakfast
Taught Richard Branson how to FLEX in an all-expenses-paid hot air balloon battle
Negotiated world peace via a fly ass jazz-hands hip hop dance off with Putin
Earned 3rd degree black belt while simultaneously live-streaming chess match wins

Started Shlinkin' Nov. 20, 2023
Career Progression: ☕ Unpaid Intern
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