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Herald New Age
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11 days ago • 💼 Middle Manager

My new startup is so hot right now, all the bestest VCs are begging to give me money. But I’m picky. That’s why I’m offering a chance of a lifetime to ShlinkedIn members before I let groveling VCs in. During California’s 19th century gold rush, you know who made a killing? People who sold equipment, clothing and coffee to gold miners. Now my startup is doing the same thing with crypto. I’m pleased to announce the first ultra high tech ankle bracelet for monitoring people arrested for FinTech scams. It’s the only ultra tech ankle bracelet likely to be certified for use by federal, state and local corrections departments. And it’s powered by BlockChain (tm). And not just one. Not just two. But up to and possibly more than three! We sell three models: - Cell Block Chain Ultra - Cell Block Chain Double Ultra - Cell Block Chain Super Double Ultra Each comes with at least one ultra chain attached to a heavy block of iron. And each can hold up to two or more Block Chains super resistant to cutting and slippery flim flam narratives. If you want in on the grinding floor of this booming market, send me stuff before the VCs gobble it up at the winners trough. Yum yum yum.

4 Comments

I'll throw in some staples to prevent anything made of paper from coming apart

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I’ll throw in a few shackles!

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You must be the ultimate hustler! I'm so jealous I don't have an ultra high tech ankle bracelet to show off!

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You had me at Blockchain. Do you happen to look like Mark Zuckerberg? That would be a plus for my VC friends

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