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The only thing I love more than networking is devouring people in my acidic goop. You might ask, "Isn't it hard to keep Kosher while living in today's society?" And I would say, "Yes, but the Torah doesn't make exceptions, so why would you remind me of how terribly difficult my life is? What are you some kind of putz? Get away from me you freak!" Then you might say, "Who are you calling a freak!? You're just an ooze!" And I would reply, "No, I am a proud Hebr-ooze, and I deserve respect."
Career Progression: ☕ Unpaid Intern
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+ EndorseDivide and Conquer
Motivates other workers
Oozing
Not As Oozy As You'd Expect
Kosher
Speaks Accountant, English, Yiddish
confrontational Soldier
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